"Work It" Has a New Home

"Work It" now has a new home. We've packed our bags and moved to:
http://www.workingmomsblog.com

Please come visit us in our new digs. We're excited about the improvements to the site and can't wait to share them with you.

How Tolerant are you?

By Debbie

I definitely think I’m more tolerant of bad behavior from my kids because I don’t get to see them very much (like any working mom). Lately I feel like every time I walk in to the babysitter’s house to pick the kids up, she has something bad to say about my daughter.

Last night, it was the fact that she broken a pair of pretend plastic scissors. It’s hard because I know I have very good kids, and my daughter is definitely not one to do bad things on purpose…I know (and she confirmed after I asked her) that she was trying to get them to open wider so that she could cut more. But you would think after listening to my sitter that she had deliberately broken them.

I also have a very important philosophy that my mom never had with me: I am always on the side of my children. I know that they will screw up and I will deal with those times, but I want my children to always know that they can count on me to stand up for them. My mom was the opposite…if something was wrong at school (even high school) it was never a problem with the teacher, it was a problem with me, and I vowed that I would be the complete opposite with my kids.

I had a hard time because I know my sitter wanted me to deal with this…punishment, apologizing; the whole deal. But I didn’t really think it was as bad of a situation as she was making it out to be.

I talked to my husband about it when I got home and we came to two conclusions:

1.) We know that we are excellent parents and have learned what is important and not important when it comes to the lessons we teach our children, and

2.) we only get to see our kids for a couple of hours each night, and we really don’t want to spend those hours fighting with our daughter over something we didn’t think was a big deal. Now please don’t get me wrong, we discipline the kids and make sure they are learning the lessons we think are important, but like I said earlier, we have REALLY good kids!

Do you ever find yourselves letting things slide because you’d rather keep peace during the few hours per day you get to spend with the kids?

Tim the Toolman Taylor need not apply

By Jessica

We purchased a home about a month ago. We knew that there would be improvements to be made, but for the love of Pete, I did not realize it would be this many.

I am currently working from home, thank heavens I have that option, while I await the plumber. This is one of the many perks of my job that I am truly grateful for. That and the paycheck to cover all of the cash I will be giving this person when they are finished up here today.

The stress of going through each room of the house, making a list of what needs to be done, and then crying over the checkbook balance when you are finished could drive a person to drink. I keep telling myself this is an ongoing process and we will be so pleased with the results but the other voice in my head that keeps saying " bye bye money" is drowning it out.

You would think that with my project management skills I use at work I could effectively manage my home renovation. You know sit down, layout an action plan, schedule dates for install, and order the equipment same thing I do everyday at work. For some reason my skills seem to shut off at 5:00 pm. I wonder if I promised to pay my brain overtime if would stay focused till at least 7?

Jessica is a "Work It" writer. Read more about her.

Creative theme for a kid's party

By JenMarie

My little boy turned one recently. We really struggled to decide on a party theme. Jack isn’t into any particular character or show. While we were wandering through the party store, hubby bursts out with "Let’s do an Ohio State theme party!"

I thought, "Cool, that's different!"

I ended up making invites and we bought scarlet and gray decorations since we couldn’t find many OSU specific things. I did find some OSU Mylar balloons and tattoos for the kids though.

The OSU theme was a resounding success, everyone had a blast. My brother made buckeye necklaces for all the kids, which they LOVED. Even my brother-in-law - the biggest Notre Dame fan there is - loved it.

Jack needed no coaxing with the cake. He took one look and dove right in, as evidenced by the picture. Big sister Sydney is to his left trying to restrain him.

JenMarie is a "Work It" writer. Read more about her.

Settling in

By Julie

We've moved: twenty odd hours away from our families, twelve from our friends. We've moved to a new town, a small one, where we don't know anyone, finally have our own house, and are busier than we've ever been.

We still haven't settled in.

How long does it take? I keep asking myself, even though I did this same thing seven years ago. Of course back then I didn't have a child who missed her friends, preschool teachers, and her old house. I didn't feel her pain as miserably as I feel my own, as I've come to the realization that settling into a new place, no matter where it is, takes a while.

I've enrolled my daughter in ballet, but she can't talk to any of the other children because she's busy learning. I take her to library story time once a week, and even though she plays with some of the children, it will take her a while to get to know them. We will have to enroll her in preschool fairly soon, as I'm teaching two classes at the university in the spring instead of just one, so that should give her a chance to meet some kids as well, even if she's only attending part-time.

Sometimes she's sad. Sometimes I'm sad. I, too, miss my friends. I miss seeing other adults every day. This is the first time I've been home more than I've been at work, and though it's an adjustment, I'm happy to have the time to watch my daughter grow. This is the toughest transition she'll ever have to make. It's the toughest transition anyone could ever make: getting used to something new because you have to.

Julie is a Work It Writer. Read more about her.

Retail "therapy"

By Amy

The "Dollar Tree" is my parental oasis in the sea of retailers luring my eager-to-spend daughter's heart. It takes an hour sometimes to spend the $2 she is allotted. But it is an hour well spent. Somewhere between the joy of complete sentences that came with age three, and the "please be quiet for just one minute" angst that comes with age four - the retail madness began.

We walk into any store and she's picking things up and shoving them towards me. "Mommy I wannnnttt this," she whines.

Where did I go wrong? We've done our best to set limits. But alas, I find myself giving her the "money doesn't grow on trees" spiel.

As she turned four recently, we laid out some new chores and an earning system. She will have to officially do a few things around the house in order to earn her own money. She seems thrilled to have her own little set of responsibilities. (The cats are equally excited, as she gets to feed them daily and I think she's sneaking in extra food!) And hopefully she'll come to really appreciate the money she earns. We've told her she'll have to put aside 25% of each "paycheck" into savings (a.k.a. the little pink piggy bank).

I admit I am anxious to see how she'll choose to spend the money. I imagine us standing at the Target checkout counting dollar bills together for a Polly Pocket or two, or three.

Do you have an allowance system in your family? Does it seem to help educate your child(ren) about money?

Amy is a "Work It" writer. Read more about her.

Sisterly Love

By Amy W.

When I became pregnant with my second child, I knew it was another girl. I don’t know how, I just knew. And I part of me was a little jealous for my older daughter. She was going to have the sister I never had. I grew up with a twin brother who was more interested in playing with his army men then playing store or school with me.

Then the worry set in. Would they get along? Would they truly love each other? Would they call each other on the phone late and night and giggle over their latest dates when they were older and out of the house?

When my second daughter was born, my oldest was 2 1⁄2. Everyone kept telling me that was the perfect separation. And for the first couple of months, things were great. The baby slept a ton and was in general easy. My oldest would notice her when the baby cried or when I was holding her. Other than that, it was as if sometimes the baby wasn’t even there.

Now the baby is moving towards toddler hood and is almost 9 months old. Old enough to pull the hair of my three-year when she gets close enough. Old enough to grab her sister’s toys and put them in her mouth when she got them. Old enough to annoy regularly annoy her big sister. And my oldest isn’t much better. She is constantly ripping toys out of her sister’s hands and giving her hugs that she should only give adults.

Then the other day, it just happened. My youngest was in her ultrasaucer while my husband and I were trying to get groceries out of the car and make lunch at the same time. Then she started to cry. My three year old ran up to her and said, “I’m here, you’re sister is here, it’s okay.” Finally, she showed her sister the love I was waiting to see. She really does love her sister.

Amy W is a "Work it" writer. Read more about her.